10 Items or less

Jeffrey and I went to HEB two nights ago because I wanted to pick up a few ingredients to make cookies. Technically, the cookies are called "chocolate chip," but this week I changed the name of the recipe to "I feel sorry for myself because I have to work in the lab at school on a holiday cookies." (The name's a little longer, but has more character.)

Our trip to get four items ended up taking about 30 minutes, mostly due to the fact that some of the lanes at the store are not marked clearly enough for some customers. More specifically, all three self-checkout lines were full of people who were scanning at least 50 items, ignorant or defiant to the sign that clearly states: "10 items or less." The lady with the largest amount of groceries was letting her 7 year old meticulously grab one item at a time from the basket, scan it, and return it to the basket. Very efficient.

We thought we were on the downhill slope when all three selfish self-checkout shoppers finished at about the same time, but the young man in front of us had picked that particular night (while in a line 10 people deep) to use the self-checkout line for the first time--with a huge bag of produce that requires that every produce item be keyed in by its four digit code. He did not know how to do this, and had to wait for assistance for each item.

As we were waiting for veggie boy to scan his last item, a woman approached us and asked if she could cut in front of us in line because she had been "waiting a really long time in another line." My response in my mind was, "What do you think we've been doing over here?!?!"

Luckily, I took a few moments to think before I responded to her, and during my hesitation Jeffrey (my better and more compassionate half) sweetly said, "Sure, you can go ahead of us."

I ended up being glad that he let her go in front of us. She only had three items: 2 gallons of milk and a carton of lactaid. I assumed from her purchases that she has a small child at home and was probably just exhausted and needing to go home to him or her.

I felt sorry for her until she dropped her gallon of milk in the middle of the aisle and it exploded all over our feet.

After much trial and tribulation, we did eventually get to check out. Only a few comments were made after we left the store. Jeffrey said, "I think maybe instead of saying '10 items or less' they should have an IQ test for the self-checkout lines." I just said, "Man, it was like Walmart in there tonight!"

And speaking of Walmart, I must tell you about a fantastic website I found a few weeks ago...it's called peopleofwalmart.com. Basically, it's a collection of pictures of people (or animals) taken at Walmart. A delicious sampling of humanity. The website is experiencing periodic crashes due to massive amounts of traffic, but I was able to get on once this morning for enough time to see this picture:In case you can't see it clearly, that is a picture of a mother nonchalantly pushing her cart while her child puts a plastic bag over her head. Anybody know the number for CPS?