Whose 'Wich?

Since my last blog post, several important things have happened in my life. First and foremost, our air conditioning got fixed! It took almost 48 hours, but it's worked well since the guy worked out the kinks at our house last Tuesday.

Secondly, I took my board exam on Monday. And it still hurts. The test was 400 questions long and took me about 4.5 hours to finish. I knew some questions, I narrowed some questions down to 2 answer choices, and on some I simply had to choose "C," that old standby answer that comes in handy when you have no idea what the question is even asking.

Third, a frog moved into one of my flower pots. Can you find him?


Fourth, I heard the most hilarious story ever. I think it's even funnier than the time my teacher's pants fell off while he was teaching. Once upon a time...

I have a friend in my class who we call "Sage." His name is spelled something like "Sahegin" or something, but none of us are very good at saying it, so he mercifully allows us to shorten and butcher it down to the more palatable nickname. Sage was studying for his board exam at the library one day when he realized it was getting late. He figured that his study time might run through dinner, so he decided to grab a sandwich from the Subway in our building before it closed, then save it until he got hungry. He put this plan into motion and soon returned to his table at the library with a sub, lovingly wrapped by our local "sandwich artist."

A few minutes later, he noticed that a woman had sat down across from him at the table. He was a little annoyed at this encroachment on his study space, but quickly got more annoyed when the lady reached over and moved Sage's sandwich closer to her. The woman didn't even take her eyes off the journal she had been reading, so Sage figured it must have been some unconscious tidying movement that made the woman move his sandwich.

Suddenly, the next time Sage looked up, he saw that the woman had picked up and unwrapped his sandwich, and just as Sage was saying, "Hey, that's my sandwich," the woman licked it. She licked his sandwich!

After licking the sandwich, she started to wrap it back up and give it to Sage. Sage said (angrily) that she could have the sandwich now, and she asked politely, "Are you sure?"

Sage replied that he was sure (thinking in his head that he was sure he didn't want to get a disease from his saliva-covered sandwich), and then reported the sandwich theft to the nearest campus police officer.

All this begs the question: If you lick something, and the owner is so disgusted that he gives the licked item to you, does it still count as stealing? If not, I'll be licking all of your cars and wallets the next time I see you. Jackpot.